Like asthma, it seems like this past month or so has had days where I could breath (figuratively speaking) easy and then there were days where it felt like someone was cutting off my breath and I was fighting to inhale. The joys were high and the lows were low. But in it all there were and are things to be so grateful for. I found that being able to sit down and knit or spin such a gift. It was in those times where I could hide myself and think and go through all the things I'm grateful for, coming out ready to see a bright side and the answers I needed, ready to see how God was going to work these things out, because they were beyond me.
So that's why I haven't been around, just dealing with things, handling the ever changing personality of a family member with dementia, and the endless juggling of life.
On a funny note, when I was in art school, I was always told that my best work came out of my pain. My creativity soared, as my mind filled with all these ideas and my execution of what medium I was using was right on point. Well it seems that I still have some of that, because through this past month I've casted on WAY too many things, but I just had to. I couldn't help myself, :-) so here's a little list.
- Celtic Kindle Cover
- A scarf
- Baby Surprise Jacket
- I'm writing a toe up sock pattern for beginners
- I'm about 1/3 into a Celtic Baby Blanket pattern that I'm writing
- and I started a shawl that I've ended up frogging because I didn't like how the yarn looked in that particular pattern.
In closing I want to let you know that it's really ok and a good thing to emerge yourself into things you love (healthy things) when times get a little overwhelming. Find things that slow your mind down and give yourself permission to deal with it all one step at a time. Realize that there are things that you just cannot handle. By acknowledging those things is a relief, it's a step in letting them go and allowing to work out. It clears the way for you handle what you can. So stop, and inhale, take a deep breath, focus on the slow exhale and be grateful, starting with being able to inhale.